The Day is Done

Okay. I totally underestimated how busy planning the wedding would keep me. As September 18th approached, I had hoped to keep a record of the planning process in real-time but that (clearly) didn't happen. I'm happy to report that after many unforeseeable glitches in my perfect wedding plan, our big day actually arrived and exceeded my expectations for our very perfect and special wedding day.

What I can say after all is said and done, is that planning - for sure - is key. But without a doubt, not everything will go as planned and you have to be okay with that. Actually, you have to embrace that some of the best memories and elements from that day will likely be what was unplanned. So, be prepared... and be prepared.

Here are a few of the details and spectacular moments from that great day!

 This lovely sash of chiffon rosettes was created by my friend, Sky Liu, to adorn my dress. I loved the dress but loved it a million times more with this amazing little belt.

 I bought and returned about 7 pairs of shoes before settling on these light gray suede shoes. I didn't want a traditional pair of bridal shoes and finally found something comfortable, tall and with enough sass to make a statement.

 The bridesmaids and I getting all dolled up.

 The groom getting suited up next door.

 It fits!

 It took a few minutes to fasten the buttons.

 Almost ready... I'm wondering if I've forgotten anything.

 My sister and maid of honor delivers a card to the groom.

 Let's get pinned! The groom's mom helped me make the boutonnieres from herbs and flowers we bought at the grocery store. I was obsessed with this idea I saw at OnceWed, but in hindsight I should have just had the Farmer's Market provide them. The men smelled like a turkey dinner from the rosemary.

 Avery, my niece, came running down the aisle during the ceremony to take her place near her mom. She was the ring-bearer moreso than the flower girl. But she was adorable! She lasted about 5 minutes then had to be removed. We expected that with a two year-old.

 The groom in anticipation.

 Walking in with my dad, I was so giggly I couldn't compose myself. Especially after I saw my sister crying.

 Okay, so we're both a little giddy.

 Our ceremony was short and sweet, performed by my husband's father, George. We had him ordained online for $30. Having Bill's father marry us made it that much more meaningful... we wanted someone who knew us both well.

 Another find from Etsy, we had this poster-sized wedding announcement created in our wedding colors and matted it to provide our guests with a "guestbook" alternative to the traditional portrait that's been so popular. This looks so great hanging in the living room now and such a pleasant reminder of that day.

 You can't count on the weather. We had hoped for sunshine to take advantage of the outdoor space at The Viewpoint Inn for our ceremony which overlooks the river. It rained so hard you couldn't see 50 yards so the ceremony was moved inside. But we grabbed an umbrella and got some great shots in the rain. Ah, Oregon.

 My dear friends, Gabrielle and her mom, Marybeth, were pivotal in pulling everything together on the day of the wedding. They are both superstars and because of them I was absolutely worry-free that day. Here they are with my sister and the few kids that attended our wedding.

 My sister was incredibly nervous as she gave her speech. She killed it... as you can see.

 The bouquet toss had exactly four potential catchers, including a ten year-old. I told you I was nearly dead last to get hitched.

 Bill really tried to reach up my skirt. Inappropriate.

 Thanks to my awesome shoes, our huge height difference didn't impede our first dance. We had the pleasure of hiring the most amazing and talented musician, Shaun Barrowes, and his band (including a break dancer) for our wedding. I had requested Jason Mraz's song "I'm Yours" as our processional, which he killed. He played it again for our first dance. It was so beautiful.

 My niece was going nonstop. It was sort of amazing. What a party animal.

The night ended way too early. What an amazing, amazing day. Looking back, I would not change one thing... except to extend the evening a little longer.

Monterey and Gabe's Babes

I took a trip up to Monterey this last weekend to meet up with one of my oldest and dearest friends. Gabrielle (aka Gabe) and I have known each other for almost 33 years and many of my most-cherished childhood memories include Gabe and her family, whom we spent a lot of time with back in the day. She must have been my very first friend, and I know for a fact I was hers.  We have a photo of Sally (my older sister by sixteen months) and myself at maybe a year old, holding a few months old Gabrielle on our laps... Proof!


Gabe is a devoted wife and mother of six who amazes and inspires me constantly. She is full of love and generosity and has a seemingly endless supply of friendship and support to offer those lucky enough to know her. I cannot even begin to elaborate on what a giving, sweet and dedicated friend, mom and wife she is!


Upon our engagement last July, Gabe immediately reached out to be a part of the wedding planning process, offering help with anything and everything. Gabe is one of the most resourceful and creative people I know, and I was eager to include her in the planning, filling her in on all the details and getting her input and advice. I wanted to look back on my wedding and know that Gabe was a part of it, just as I had been a part of hers. Since wedding topics were on the top of our agenda, I packed up all my spreadsheets, venue floor plans, decor ideas, inspirational photos and magazine articles and brought them along for the weekend. She had a million great ideas, reminded me of important tasks I would have neglected to add to my to-do's, and offered all the day-off encouragement and support (and maybe a little stiff-arming) that a bride might need from her oldest and dearest friend. Gabe is truly a treasure.


Every time I turn around, there's a new addition to Gabe's family. I no longer ask if there will be any more or presume that this newest one will be their last. As time has gone by and the course of our lives become separated by years, states, experiences, having the opportunity like this past weekend to catch up, reconnect, and rejoin each others' lives was priceless. Besides reconnecting with Gabe, the highlight for me was obviously having the opportunity to really get to know the kids... all six of them. Aside from infrequent and brief visits through the years, I think the only real connection they felt to me was the fact that I was "Aunt Ellen" by way of being "Mommy's Friend." I had seen them grow and their personalities emerge in snippets through these brief visits and Christmas card updates but this was the first extended, and dedicated visit I had with Gabe and the kiddos while their dad was away for the weekend. It was just us and we had a fabulous time. They are an impressive brood and I grew to adore them even more. 


I should have taken more pictures to include some additional highlights like homemade donuts for breakfast (dipped in frosting and covered in sprinkles... definitely not on the wedding diet but so worth it.) I have the feeling the menu was kicked up a notch because I enjoyed many special treats. Coffee cake. Baked Brie. Snicker-doodles (freshly made by Gabe's oldest and culinarily gifted daughter) and Raspberry Tea. I felt a little spoiled. It was awesome.


One thing the kids and I were obsessed with was building a Lego tower that would reach the ceiling. After many failed attempts ending in dangerous hailstorms of Legos in the living room, we finally succeeded thanks to the engineering efforts of all the kids. Now that I have pictures of:

These were our attempts at lego towers. The first one came crashing down before we could even have the fun of knocking it down with the catapult (or trebuchet as the French call it, I think.) Then, finally, we succeeded in building our free-standing lego tower that reached all the way to the ceiling. Even I have to admit, it was impressive.


Here are just a few more cute shots of the kids... it's a shame I don't have more of us playing outside or our many delicious meals.

Big Sis Emma and a goofy Max

Sweet Number Six: Claire

Riley and the trebuchet, a contemplative Jane

Precocious Sam and Max in the background with his camera

Math Lessons and Meeting Cole

Today's post would be totally out of place except that, thankfully, my friend (and bridesmaid), Jen, asked a very poignant question yesterday during my long-overdue visit to meet her not-so-newborn son, Cole.

Jen is one of my oldest friends. We've been through everything together: high school, college, boyfriends, breakups, you name it. I'm not entirely sure what makes us click as friends because from the outside, we seem pretty different. Except we share the exact same sense of humor: a really stupid one. I don't think other people get us. And I'm pretty sure everyone else around is irritated when we are together. I love her like a sister.

Despite not living in the same city since basically college, we see each other pretty often. Usually. A couple years ago Jen planned her own wedding and during that time, I frequently and happily made almost three hour drive between Beverly Hills and San Diego to help out. It was fun but I think I got a little burnt out.

Then we both got busy. I was in a new relationship, traveling a little, and settling into our new beach house. She was settling into married life, traveling a lot, and getting preggers. Then I dropped the ball. She and her husband welcomed baby Cole last September and I kept putting off the visit down to say hello to the little guy. The holidays came and went, and still I hadn't visited. Oh, I had a million great excuses: busy planning the wedding, going out of town, family coming to visit, need a break from hectic weekends, work is stressful, and boy is that drive LOOONG.

Okay, here's where the math lesson comes in: because I moved 20 miles south, I am 1 hour closer to San Diego. Which means this loooong drive of almost three hours is really only and hour an 45 minutes. I really did not think of that. Not really a drive worth whining about. Got it. Thank you, Jen, for pointing this out to me yesterday.

Anyway, the drive doesn't matter anymore. They just moved to Orange County. Whatever.

Bottom line: I finally met Cole and he is adorable. He immediately reached out when I offered to hold him, was completely chill and unfussy, and has the cutest expression of curiosity and wonder on his face 90% of the time.

We had a really fun day reconnecting; Jen got a break from cleaning and unpacking and I filled her in on the latest wedding plans. And here is how this long winded story ties into everything. She asked, completely unprompted and no I'm not making this up just so I can tell you about my day yesterday, "you said that planning the wedding has been a piece of cake and I was wondering why?"

Ah, Jen. Great question...

First Things First

Blogging is overwhelming. One post, a little "about me" update and I feel mentally kaput. So I think I'll kick things off with a little stroll down memory lane and share a few pics from the engagement.

We took this photo at the center of Lana'i at the Four Seasons Koele Lodge. It was July 4th and we had just arrived from O'ahu. Bill surprised me with an escape to Hawaii for the long weekend. Little did I know, the real surprise was yet to come.

I think the look on my face says it all.

In the secluded library late at night at Koele Lodge. Too bad it was 2am back home on the west coast... we had to wait until the morning to share the news.

The landscape at Koele is like nothing else. We took this the morning after the proposal on our last walk through the property before leaving for Maui. Lana'i is breathtakingly beautiful. Picture in your mind what Hawaii looks like... then add a dash of the Montana mountainside and a sprinkle of Southeastern Asian influence and there you have it.

It should be no surprise that after this romantic weekend in such a beautiful place that I figured I had at least one aspect of our wedding planning down: The Venue.

Then I got my first lesson in "Planning for Unexpected Disappointments."

Wedding Websites Galore

Immediately upon receiving the ring, I jumped online to begin what became the never-ending excursion through the jungle of online wedding resources... just like any newly minted fiance would do.

I started with the mainstream go-to's that even those women furthest from a proposal have on their internal bridezilla radar: the knot, martha stewart weddings, the wedding channel. I felt assured that these three wedding websites would be my key to a simply planned, stylishly executed, well budgeted affair. Done.

Not so fast, Dumas.